I woke up and went into my dad’s room (My parents had moved in with me after hurricane Katrina damaged the city in which they had lived.) He looked worse than normal that day. He was shaking and he said to me, without opening his eyes, “Don’t use the tanks marked ‘MT’ it means they’re empty.” What he was thinking of when he said that I could only speculate but in some strangely comical way it seemed logical. His kidneys were at nearly zero function, he had been speaking erratically, and vomiting profusely for weeks. The hospice nurse said it would be like this and that it was only a matter of time now. But I had faith and if I TRULY believed than the Holy Spirit would heal him. So, I went to work….that will be a true profession of faith! I believe he’ll be ok so much that I will go about my day! Two hours later I got the phone call that he was dead. Gone. He was really gone. I wasn’t there to hold his hand. I wasn’t there to wipe his brow. I wasn’t there to consol my mother when the moment came. I was gone…..in more ways than I can put into words.
Andrew Wommack spoke at a child’s funeral years ago and to paraphrase him he said, “God is not willing for anyone to die and this child is dead because of a lack of faith.” He has written a book entitled, “Self centeredness the root of all grief.” In which grief itself is seen as a selfish act of a lack of faith. You may think both these instances harsh, but let’s not be too hard on Mr. Wommack because this is the natural conclusion of a world-view in which a sovereign God does not rein. If man is in control of reality through his faith than all “bad things” that happen to a believer must be the fault of the believer. After all the unspoken mantra of the health wealther is, “My will be done.” with the guise of “Thy will be done.” Again, the problem with all of this is that everything is centered on man and not God. Everything must be filtered through our finite understanding. So, in the eyes of the health-wealther our only comfort must be in our own ability to control our lives through the strength of our faith. But what true comfort is there in our own ability to wield the power of God when we must filter it through our finite-still-struggling-with-sin minds and wills?
We live in a sad fallen world. But if God really has “the whole world in his hands” as the child’s song goes than is not our suffering also in those hands? Remember what we said last time, that what God wants is for us to be made into the image of His son. How could dying to flesh not be painful and conforming to Christ not include submission to His will when we are born into this world in lust and love for our sin? Maybe this is why sanctification is a process instead of in an instant because we couldn’t take it all at once. Even this, is an act of our Sovereign’s love. You see what I did not say at the intro of this post about my dad is that, though he professed faith, he had major struggles with sin (like us all). But when his body began to fail him and his prospect on what to do with his time (as well as the time itself) narrowed, he really started to stop and spend time with his Father that Art in Heaven. I watched him grow more spiritually in those final months than I saw in my lifetime living with him and in effect my family and I grew. Even the sovereign fact that I chose (my responsibility of course) to go to my insignificant job instead of staying with my family is used as a testimony and helped me in my walk with my Father God. I’m not saying that suffering is the only means we grow in Christ, but I am saying that there is no room for this type of sanctification in a health-wealth doctrine. Its center is man and his wants instead of God and His sovereign living hand on us.
Kevin DeYoung in his book The Good News We Almost Forgot said, “Trust, therefore does not mean hoping for the absence of pain but believing in the purpose of pain.” This is true faith: a total trust in God not what I can get from him. I will end this post with the very first question and answer from the Heidelberg Catechism:
Q - What is your only comfort in Life?
A- That I am not my own, but belong-body and soul, in life and in death to my faithful Savior Jesus Christ.
Amen and glory be to God for that fact, because I assure you if it were not so, we would most defiantly ruin it…
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